Friday, 13 January 2012

I Wish You Could Be More Sympathetic

2:20 pm.  HK leaves me a voicemail telling me he got a speeding ticket and that his driver's license was expired.  It expired in July.  Voicemail says to call him back.

2:45 pm.  I Call HK.  He tells me he just wanted to let me know he got a speeding ticket and that his license was expired, so he got a ticket for that, too.  I respond with some action steps he can take to avoid the situation in the future and to resolve the expired license issue. 

2:58 pm.  I receive a text from HK.  "Getting a ticket is very traumatizing, I wish you could be sympathetic / comforting"

So, here I sit, not knowing what to do next.  Do I text him back and tell him I'm sorry?  To be honest, I am sorry.  I'm sorry that I'm not sympathetic and comforting.  I wish I knew the right words to say.  When I get new information, I think action steps and impacts.  The emotional piece doesn't even cross my mind.  Its frustrating for everyone involved - especially my friends. 

I'm often faced with these situations and I think about the appropriate way to handle them.  Do I memorize the right words to say and try to come up with some dialogue that makes me seem sympathetic, so that my friend feels better?  Or do I take a more honest approach and tell him I'm truly sorry that I am not sympathetic?

Throughout my life, I've opted for the first choice when it comes to the NT world.  I make up an answer that satisfies.  Maybe its time I start thinking about the second response because that's how I truly feel.

Tuesday, 10 January 2012

Emotions. Hope Do You Cope?

Emotions.  Where do I start?  I've been a bit stressed lately and not getting quite the amount of sleep I need.  And that makes me emotional.  The problem is I don't know what to do with these emotions.

Frankly, I want these emotions to go away.  If I could ask anybody one thing it would be - what steps do I need to take to make these feelings go away as quickly as possible?  Its uncomfortable.  I don't like it. Tears sting my eyes and I think - why the hell am I crying?

Logically, I know why I'm upset.  There are a few too many things in my life at the moment that are out of my control.  And not knowing what the future holds is upsetting.  My natural instinct is to hide and show my emotions to no one.  I want to pretend to the outside world that everything is fine and that I'm coping well.

I'm curious to know - what do typical people do to cope with emotions?  Do you cry it out?  Do you turn to a friend for support?  And how do you know who to trust with your feelings?  Personally, I'd like to see a 5 step process to get your emotions under control.  Can somebody write a book about that please?!?

My natural instinct is to analyze and try to rid myself of these uncomfortable feelings as quickly as possible.  I know with the time the emotion will pass and I will be back to my analytical and logical self.  But I'd like to know what coping strategies most people use to get through it. 

Right now to get through it, I'm focusing my thoughts on Goa in a couple weeks.  Traveling is my happy place.  Its the only time where I can truly be myself and feel genuinely happy.  I'm hoping my travel break in a couple weeks will help me cope a little better with life's unexpected.

What do you do to help you through those emotional times in your life?