Friday, 18 November 2011

The Work Boyfriend

I have a work boyfriend, I'll call him WB.  And for the most part he's cute, listens to my problems and is an all around good friend.  We have lunches and coffee together and we like to dump on each other when something really wonky starts going on at work.  We're really comfortable with each other.  But sometimes I just don't get his humor.  Like today.

Today he approached me to show me a picture on his iPhone.  It was a picture of him in front of the American flag.  The conversation went something like this:

Him:  I want to get it on with you in front of this flag *laughs*
Me:  You are disgusting and need to leave.
Him: *walks away laughing*
Me: (loudly)You are NOT funny
Him: (Mumbles under his breath) The important thing is I think I'm funny *walks away*

I don't get it.  I honestly don't understand why that comment was funny.  I'm not offended.  I mean guys are guys right?  And sometimes they think sexual comments are HILARIOUS.  Whatever.  The odd thing about this encounter is that this isn't the first time I've heard this comment. 

Yes, I'm Asian.  And yes, a college boyfriend asked me to do that very same thing (except he was serious about it - I think).  He actually went so far as to buy me an American flag for my dorm room.  At the time, I didn't think much of it.  I gave the flag to my dad and told said boyfriend that I misplaced the flag.  I used my typical Aspie approach - avoid and make up lies!

And that leads me to the following questions...
What is propagating this strange thought in men - me getting it on in front of an American flag?   
Why is this funny?
And do I just not get it because I have Asperger's?

WB just stopped by my desk to apologize.  I asked him why he thought it was funny.  And naturally, he didn't know.  Guess my questions will remain unanswered.  At least for now...


  1. "I used my typical Aspie approach - avoid and make up lies!"

    Ha ha! I often do the same.

    The whole thing with your WB and the American flag kinda reminds me of something I read in a parenting article about how children test their boundaries. I wonder if your WB is doing the same with you - testing you with a little overt innuendo, to feel you out for maybe a possible romance? one-night stand? etc. - and then pulling back with the old "Ha ha, I was just kidding" line when you get angry.

    (and by the way, good on you for standing up and not taking that crap, if you know what I mean)

    It's just a theory, from an outsider's perspective. Admittedly, I'm trying to come up with a scenario where such an exchange would be anything but offensive or eyebrow-raising at the very least. Perhaps if the whole "let's do it in X scenario" was a running joke between you two? Doesn't sound like it is, though.

  2. I don't have Asperger's. And I don't understand why this would be funny either.

  3. I'm glad you agree! NOT FUNNY. It wasn't just me after all :)

  4. Moreover its normal approach to avoid and make up lies! Apparently I am also not getting the point to consider WB's comment as funny. May be a sexual approach or just freaky task.