Sunday 31 July 2011

Roll On Monday

This weekend was not enjoyable.  It was filled with drama.  And let me tell you... I hate drama.  The moment it rears its ugly head, I want to run away.  Unfortunately, running away only makes is worse.  This weekend was no different.

It all started with a text on Friday.  P texted me and I texted her back.  Normal interaction.  I'm thinking everything is great and I go out to dinner with a close friend, N.  N and I are enjoying dinner and chatting about our week.  I mention the text interaction I had with P earlier in the day.  Wow.  Big Mistake.

Turns out what I thought was interesting conversation only sends N into a fit of rage.  Before I know it, N is obviously angry.  He is raising his voice and peppering me with questions.  I've obviously done something wrong.  Unfortunately, I am clueless as to why a simple text would send him into a fit of rage.  Naturally, this makes things worse.  And the more emotional he gets, the more I want to run away.  And the more I want to run away, the madder he gets.  This lasts the ENTIRE weekend.  What a vicious circle!

And this is how it always goes.  I unintentionally do something that makes someone mad.  They tell me how angry I made them.  I wish with all my heart that I could take back whatever it is I did.  And if the person is mad enough, they keep at it.  They ask me numerous questions.  Each of which I cannot answer correctly. 

The entire time, I'm wishing I could say the right thing.  If only I could say the words that would make him stop getting mad!  Do I tell him that I want to run away?  What can I say to make it stop?  Why does the drama keep dragging on and on?  How can I answer his questions in a way that will make him feel better?  If I only had those answers!

Its Sunday night and thankfully, the drama is largely over.  I'm exhausted and feel an overwhelming urge to withdraw.  Friends are SO exhausting... I don't know how you all do it.  I'm looking forward to the week, so I can find comfort and solace in my daily routines.  In fact, it can't come quick enough... Roll On Monday!!



2 comments:

  1. Hi Emily, I've just been enjoying your posts. Love your style and the perspective you bring, and the gorgeous pictures of Kashmir. I sympathise with you regarding Delhi traffic - it's a struggle for anyone to deal with, especially combined with the heat.

    I'm interested in reading more about your perspectives as a person with Asperger's. Before I moved to India I used to volunteer with a young people's theatre group in London, and several of our members were on the autistic spectrum. I think it's still something the world (including myself) could do with understanding more. Your father sounds like a really remarkable fellow.

    All the best,

    Chris

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  2. Thanks Chris! I just started this blog a couple of months ago and your comments are so encouraging. Thank You!

    I welcome your NT (Neurotypical) perspectives and think its fabulous that you've already worked with some individuals on the spectrum.

    Wow! From London to Delhi... that must be SO interesting. Can't wait to hear more about it.

    Em

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